Soothing

I drove past Shake Shack on the way home from the store today.

The miracle is that I didn't stop. I could feel the impulse to soothe with food.

I spent some time last night, figuring out how I would use the buffer zone this week. I love the way WildFit organizes time and seasons, and offers a structure that is meaningful even beyond the challenge. I think I always will think of Thursday night through Sunday night as the buffer zone. Liminal time. Time for reflection, for preparation. Time to gently transition to something new if I need to.

I haven't had a green smoothie in a few weeks and I decided to have one this week. It tasted bitter, a note to self that I may be eating too many sweet foods ~ like sweet vegetables, root vegetables, and fruit. I am not eating sugar. At least, not intentionally. Some may have snuck in when I've been out to eat. It's a reason I don't eat out very often any more.

I decided to use a hack recommended for this kind of situation. And what's the situation? I'd like to be a little more disciplined and intentional around eating. I'd like to shore up my nutrients. Reorient my palate. Follow my three-month plan more closely. 

So I'll use the buffer zone, three days, to help me transition back to more disciplined eating by going back to basics. Start the day with some fruit, and then add some fruit to my green smoothie. Make another pot of roasted red pepper soup and pair that with salads for lunch. Have a serving of animal protein and some roasted vegetables for dinner. Make some artichoke hummus and divide that into portions. By Monday, I hope to switch back to savory green smoothies and enjoy them in the morning for the week. Swap out the roasted veg soup for a protein with my salads at lunch, and keep dinner the same.

A two-week group is being offered by my former WildFit coach around emotional eating, with some intensive reflection work. It starts on Monday. I think I'll sign up for that. Anytime I'm tempted to stop at Shake Shack to soothe with food, there's something emotional going on, and I'd like to have some extra support.

A friend suggested I get myself some flowers today instead. I shared with her a story about something that happened just before we spoke on the phone.

I saw a beautiful bouquet of flowers at Whole Foods for $19.99. I didn't want to spend the money. It's interesting to notice that I'd spend that at Shake Shack for lunch, but thought it was too much to spend on flowers. 

I'll just let that hang right here for a minute. 

The Green Wilderness is a daily writing practice that opens a landscape of discovery into my own human experience. 

Katherine Cartwright has been blogging since 2012, and each year brings new wonders. She asks big questions of the small things in life.