Challenge Accepted

I posted the picture of my coronavirus hair, not of my freshly coiffed, freshly cut, freshly attended hair. The bangs, I'd trimmed myself over the four and half months in quarantine, and not very well. It had been nearly six months since my last appointment, so all my layers had grown out. I am wearing no makeup and my hair is air dried, no product, no style. It is just me, in all my natural beauty. 

I'd waited til after my salon appointment today, figuring I would be freshly groomed, chic, polished. A professional would have styled me. But. No.

There was something about the smile that drew me. The wild look of my hair. The fresh face. Even at 58, I am still fresh-faced. I like it when a photograph captures my wildness.

I'd seen the "challengeaccepted" and "womensupportingwomen" hashtags all over social media. Most of my friends have given up tagging others and post simply #challegeaccepted or "consider yourself challenged." I had not planned to participate. And then this morning I read an article about the origins of this wave moving across the social media waters. It began in Turkey, to bring attention to the femicide that is rampant in that culture. The death of one woman, murdered by her boyfriend, was the match that lit the tinder. What strikes me about this is that male violence against women is still so rampant, across culture, deeply embedded in the fabric of culture.  Here and abroad.

Consider the recent spectacle on Capitol Hill. A Florida congressman verbally assaulted Rep. Alexandria Ocasio-Cortez, D-NY. His non-apology and her brilliant speech on the House floor educated not just the Congress, but the nation, about the misogyny that is deeply embedded in American life. And how destructive this kind of irresponsible and dehumanizing speech is. Something she said stays with me, that her parents did not raise her to take abuse from a man. 

The thing is, though, so many women are raised to do exactly that -- to take abuse from men, to remain silent around rape and domestic violence, harassment in the workplace, harassment on the street, the macro- and micro-aggressions that are a part of our daily experience. In and out of the home.

I find myself wishing for the lighter interpretation around this challenge, the beauty of women lifting other women. I'm weary of the heaviness of our times. But, I think what ultimately tipped the balances in my posting for this is to add my image to the sea of images of other women, supporting and remembering each other, whatever our experience. We accept the challenge of showing up and choosing to be present, making our voices heard, telling our stories, advocating for each other, humanizing each other, and raising our sons and daughters to shape a different kind of experience for all people. 

Days of Accidental Beauty: 40 Days of Noticing is a daily writing practice that invites discovery.