Me, Happier

A box of happiness arrived at my door today.

Turns out that it's not magic. You have to work at it. 

I was watching a local PBS station recently, not the big one, one of the smaller ones. I love their programming. They often have some old, funky offerings as well as those PBS-offered-only-when-they-are-fundraising-personal-wellness shows. I love the specials with Dr. Daniel Amen and his work with the brain. It seems that the brain really is the control center of everything in life, including happiness.

Last year for my summer blogging project I spent 100 days noticing what was emerging in my life around happiness. It seems that just being aware of happiness and directing some energy toward it raises my happiness level. What I've noticed in the intervening months is that when I am not intentionally cultivating happiness, it can slip away and I can fall into habits that actually undermine my happiness. 

All of this is borne out in Dr. Amen's studies. We have to work at it. At least a little. And we have to have some awareness around it and direct some energy toward it. 

Is it weird that I've started thinking about happiness while I am grieving?

Probably not. 

I know that I cannot escape the grief I am experiencing. I also want to feel better, to grieve in healthy ways and not throw out my well-being while grieving. To be as intentional as I can about all of this. 

At least when I am in my right mind. 

Dr. Amen talks about seven "secrets" to happiness. Of course, calling them "secrets" is a way to get people's attention. They're pretty predictable. Things like do healthy things for and with your body. Think good thoughts. Don't believe everything you think. Give attention to relationships -- spiritual, family, friendships, social, professional. Take some time to think about what makes you happy. It might not be the same thing that makes other people happy or even something you have assumed about yourself.

It's the first on the list of "secrets" that might stymie us a bit. "Know your brain type." Dr. Amen is a psychiatrist who also studies the brain structure (not simply symptoms and behaviors). He's identified types within everything he's studied - types of ADD and ADHD, for example. One kind of treatment does not fit all the types. He's done the same thing with the brain, relative to happiness. Identified what he calls five brain types. And, of course, you can have a dominant type and a combination of other types figuring in to your own unique expression of these types. 

The box of happiness that arrived at my door contains the everything-you-need package to really dive in if I want to. I'm starting with the book. I have to admit, though, that it's slow going with the reading. His material is so dense and my attention span so loose these days, but it feels like a good place to begin. There's an app and a 30-day plan, but that feels like it's too much right now.  

It's just fun to know that a box of happiness has arrived at my door, and that I can open it up and poke around and pull out what I need for today. 

Creating Space: Three Months of Showing Up for What's Showing Up is a daily writing practice.

Katherine Cartwright has been blogging since 2012, and each year brings new wonders. She asks big questions of the small things in life.