And I think it may be the strangest shopping list I've ever written. Stranger still, was my need to actually go out to the store for these two items. But I had a need for both. The painter's tape, to hang some comics on the wall and create a gallery to inspire me to continue the writing practices I learned at the workshop last week, and the prosciutto because I bought beautiful peaches at the farm market yesterday and arugula at the grocery store. It suddenly occurred to me this morning that I had two of three ingredients for my favorite summer dish, grilled peaches wrapped in prosciutto and served over arugula, drizzled with a balsamic vinaigrette.
Truth be told, it's a four-ingredient dish. There are also chopped pistachios on the dish. I don't think I have any in my pantry. And it doesn't really matter because when I was at the store, I picked up some Thai chicken burgers and noodles to make a pad thai. That's what I had for dinner. The peaches will be on the menu tomorrow.
That's a bit how my choosing has been going lately. Like the path of a fly in summer. Here, there, all around everywhere, and nowhere expected. Even today's writing is not what I'd expected to write about, which was around choice. I may make my way there, eventually, but this feels more like it's about the truly strange shopping trip I took today and food.
I almost made it out of the store with only the two items on my list.
But there were two problems. The first was the fabulous selection of prosciutto at the store. I picked up what I bought for the grilled peach dish, but then my eye caught a more expensive and beautiful Prosciutto di Parma. I could not resist. And I walked back to the produce section and got a cantaloupe.
Once I got the melon, it was off to pick out a nice parmigiano-reggiano because, of course, that will be nice with the prosciutto and melon. And then the tiny jar of fig jam caught my eye and somehow made its way into my little cart. And then I figured that as long as I was getting a few things, I might as well get a few things more. I had a taste for Thai food and picked up the chicken and noodles. I had the other ingredients at home.
Except for the scallions, so it was back to the produce section.
Yes, just like the path of a fly on a summer day.
The other challenge to my original list is the hardware section of this grocery store did not have painter's tape. So, I popped into the Rite Aid next door and it was sold out.
I picked up something I'd not seen before, Scotch (brand) Wall-Safe Tape with Post-It Technology. Seriously. It actually says all that. It was a little pricey, but less expensive than driving over to Lowe's or Home Depot, so there it is.
All of that took my mind off the unexpected beauty of the day.
My iPhone weather app predicted thunderstorms and rain all day, so I decided to sleep in and take a rest and restoration day instead of doing something fun and adventurous. I'd planned some rest and integration days for my re-entry after my workshop. First, because it was an intense and rigorous week that included travel, and second, because it's so easy to lose life-changing experiences if you jump back into work too quickly.
The kind of work I do is not easy to take time away from. I work twice as hard the week before I go and the week after I return. Sometimes it's so intense that I lose all that I'd gained by being away. So I've learned to carefully plan time away so that I can nurture my gains rather than allowing them to be sucked away by the vacuum of return.
By the time I got up today and did my morning pages and everything else related to getting moving for the day, it was almost noon and instead of sleeping while it rained, I slept through a great morning. My morning journal today is filled with all kinds of self-disparagement for choosing poorly. And also with self-scolding for all the self-judgment and self-criticism.
All that got me thinking about how important it is that we own our choices, regardless of the choices we make.
There are factors that we simply cannot anticipate or control, and so kicking ourselves because we sleep through a great morning rather than having spent time planning something for what just as easily could have been disappointing because of weather that did not align and missing a great opportunity to sleep in accompanied by luscious gentle rainfall, is pointless. I remind myself that my choice this weekend was to rest, restore, and integrate after the exertions and intensity of the previous week. That rest, restoration, and integration, as well as the exertion and intensity, were all choices. Great choices.
I feel like I've got a mouth full of something that can't be completely masticated. It may be that the topic of choice will come up again. It may be the new weekly theme. This writing seems to call up themes that emerge and want to be opened up and looked at again and again.
For now, I'm hearing the eleven o'clock news from the TV in the other room. They've found an alligator in a creek behind someone's house. That's quite a find in Philadelphia.
I'm choosing to sign off and go hear what that's all about.
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