It's been one of those days. I talked to a few other people who report similar experiences -- the need to exhale and allow their bodies to relax, for oxygen to rush to the brain and to step back and rethink some things.
Talked to my publishing company about their production team's mistake with my table of contents. I could detail all the woes but it's the outcome, ultimately, that matters. I'll need to pay for it to be corrected and there's likely another several weeks to wait before receiving another print proof. When they get the table of contents fixed and not make any new errors, the book will be good to go.
My contact said to me, "Isn't it good enough? Do you really need to have these changes for one point size? You need to think about this."
I thought about it for a few breaths, and then when we got off the phone I thought about it some more.
No. It's not good enough. It's disharmonious with the rest of the book and, if I were to let it go to press like this, every time I looked at it I would feel angry and disappointed. I've worked too hard and my work is worth being offered beautifully and harmoniously.
So, yes. I really have to have this change for a single point size. It matters.
When we were on the phone I asked her if she'd seen the printed version. "No, I've only seen it on the screen," she said. So, she doesn't understand. But I do.
It feels like punting, but I've made peace with it. I'll pore over the book again this evening to note anything else that might need to be adjusted. I'll see it as an opportunity and take full advantage of it. I'd noticed a couple of stylistic things in the proof that I'd missed. things that no one else would notice. Nothing to delay publication over, but as long as we're correcting the proof, we'll take care of those things too.
To take my mind off all this, I got back to my painting project. The first part is done and in a few hours I'll lay down the second coat. It will dry over night before I turn it over and paint the top and main body of the cabinet. I've had to be strategic about this painting project. And I notice the same tendency to put in extra effort to get it just right. It's going into my home after all. It's worth my effort to create beauty and harmony there as well.
Getting lost in the painting helped me to regain my equilibrium and open to empathy. I don't envy my contact at the publishing company. She's between a rock and a hard place. Between authors who want excellent outcomes and her colleagues who want to save on costs. If they'd checked their work the first time around, we wouldn't be here now, so I'll insist on that going forward. And I'll be much more careful about what they've given me and not assume that they have the same level of impeccability around their work as I do. That sounds harsh, but experience has taught me that it's the case.
I look up and notice the sky just after sunset, streaked with pink that is deepening so beautifully I have to stop typing and simply watch. There's a peach tart cooling on the stove top. I've made it in the rustic French galette style. The kitchen is fragrant and all my senses are firing.
The Great Summer Writing Retreat of 2019 continues. One hundred days of writing unedited ideas and following a prompt to its sometimes illogical conclusion.
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